THE HEART OF HOMESTAY

The homestay program—in which students from around the world temporarily live with a family in another country—sees thousands of participants every year, and Wilson shares the work it takes to be a successful host parent. Personal stories from various homestay families, highlighting the meaningful connections that can develop between all those involved, are interspersed with practical tips that can help make the stay a successful one. Tips include being aware of physical cultural differences (e.g., eye contact is considered rude in some cultures), as well as more pragmatic distinctions (toilet paper is thrown in the trash instead of flushed in many Asian and Southern European countries). Wilson also addresses the emotional work that it takes to be a successful host, such as choosing “willful awareness”—a type of self-reflection that includes “staying with hard topics, listening when you’d rather leave, looking toward rather than away, and acknowledging your role in the system that keeps people marginalized: this is where the learning happens” (here, Wilson paraphrases the work of psychologist Dolly Chugh, whom she quotes throughout). Blending real stories with relevant suggestions make this book a fascinating read, despite some points not quite landing. For example, a German student whose host mother became angry when the student stayed out late without calling explains that she’s used to having freedom at home. Wilson mentions that “living with an adult who cared about her well-being” was a “new experience” for this girl—indicating that having more lax rules in Germany means her parents weren’t caring, as opposed to it being a cultural difference. This is a rare slip, however. Overall, Wilson’s practical handbook contains everything a potential host family might need, while also celebrating the joy that comes with welcoming strangers into one’s home.

Feb 18, 2025 - 07:07

The homestay program—in which students from around the world temporarily live with a family in another country—sees thousands of participants every year, and Wilson shares the work it takes to be a successful host parent. Personal stories from various homestay families, highlighting the meaningful connections that can develop between all those involved, are interspersed with practical tips that can help make the stay a successful one. Tips include being aware of physical cultural differences (e.g., eye contact is considered rude in some cultures), as well as more pragmatic distinctions (toilet paper is thrown in the trash instead of flushed in many Asian and Southern European countries). Wilson also addresses the emotional work that it takes to be a successful host, such as choosing “willful awareness”—a type of self-reflection that includes “staying with hard topics, listening when you’d rather leave, looking toward rather than away, and acknowledging your role in the system that keeps people marginalized: this is where the learning happens” (here, Wilson paraphrases the work of psychologist Dolly Chugh, whom she quotes throughout). Blending real stories with relevant suggestions make this book a fascinating read, despite some points not quite landing. For example, a German student whose host mother became angry when the student stayed out late without calling explains that she’s used to having freedom at home. Wilson mentions that “living with an adult who cared about her well-being” was a “new experience” for this girl—indicating that having more lax rules in Germany means her parents weren’t caring, as opposed to it being a cultural difference. This is a rare slip, however. Overall, Wilson’s practical handbook contains everything a potential host family might need, while also celebrating the joy that comes with welcoming strangers into one’s home.