I'LL LOOK SO HOT IN A COFFIN

Sosenko, a journalist and former magazine editor, centers this memoir on her body. She was born with the congenital vascular disorder Klippel-Trenaunay syndrome. “I’m one of the lucky ones,” she writes, “but I do live in a body that is significantly, visibly different from most. There is a hypertrophy of tissue on my back, rendering it giant, blobby, lopsided, and not very back-like. My torso, right leg, and bottom are marked by soft, uneven malformations and a port wine stain so big it looks like a spilled bottle of sun-faded cabernet.” As a child, Sosenko underwent liposuctions, awaking to learn that doctors had also performed cosmetic surgery on other parts of her body. At 12, the author decided to stop having surgeries: “I was left a Frankenstein’s monster, only incomplete.” Now in her 40s, she includes innumerable accounts about people, including strangers, commenting on her appearance. Chapter titles include “It’s Okay to Let the Bastards Get You Down, Just Get Back Up When You Can (They Hate That).” In 2023, after obsessively dieting from ages 26 to 38, Sosenko began taking a weight-loss drug despite feeling guilty about it: “I believe in fat liberation….I wish I didn’t wish to be smaller.” One chapter examines her complicated relationship with her mother while another details a failed romance, closing with the revelation that “being happily single is not a last resort, it is fucking rad.” In another chapter, she tells of spending $78,000 on clothes over six months. “Wear things that make you feel fucking spectacular,” she concludes, “because you are.” The book includes further fiery insights such as this: “If the world is not designed for you or accepting of you or amenable to you, that is the fault of the world.” The author’s focus on herself can sometimes be wearisome, but her enthusiasm never wanes.

May 6, 2025 - 05:18

Sosenko, a journalist and former magazine editor, centers this memoir on her body. She was born with the congenital vascular disorder Klippel-Trenaunay syndrome. “I’m one of the lucky ones,” she writes, “but I do live in a body that is significantly, visibly different from most. There is a hypertrophy of tissue on my back, rendering it giant, blobby, lopsided, and not very back-like. My torso, right leg, and bottom are marked by soft, uneven malformations and a port wine stain so big it looks like a spilled bottle of sun-faded cabernet.” As a child, Sosenko underwent liposuctions, awaking to learn that doctors had also performed cosmetic surgery on other parts of her body. At 12, the author decided to stop having surgeries: “I was left a Frankenstein’s monster, only incomplete.” Now in her 40s, she includes innumerable accounts about people, including strangers, commenting on her appearance. Chapter titles include “It’s Okay to Let the Bastards Get You Down, Just Get Back Up When You Can (They Hate That).” In 2023, after obsessively dieting from ages 26 to 38, Sosenko began taking a weight-loss drug despite feeling guilty about it: “I believe in fat liberation….I wish I didn’t wish to be smaller.” One chapter examines her complicated relationship with her mother while another details a failed romance, closing with the revelation that “being happily single is not a last resort, it is fucking rad.” In another chapter, she tells of spending $78,000 on clothes over six months. “Wear things that make you feel fucking spectacular,” she concludes, “because you are.” The book includes further fiery insights such as this: “If the world is not designed for you or accepting of you or amenable to you, that is the fault of the world.” The author’s focus on herself can sometimes be wearisome, but her enthusiasm never wanes.